I hate to (not so much) admit it, but I’ve been conducting an independent (#fakenews) investigation. Here is what I’ve uncovered. #billoreilly didn’t sexually harass anyone (#firstlie). Everything he did was part of a #FoxNews undercover investigation (#lie2), code-named #handsize. Here is what was learned: #smallhands is president. O’Reilly has smaller hands. He lost the bet. (spoiler alert) Sexual harassment is real.